The “Getting to Good Enough” Workbook

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Imposter syndrome SUCKS.

Always trying to make the right decisions. Do the right things. Share the right parts of yourself.

Imposter syndrome is stressful and exhausting.

And it’s a battle you can’t win… if you keep playing according to its rules.

The only winning strategy is to stare it in the face and reject every lie it’s been telling you.

I’ll be the first to admit it: that takes years of work!

But it you have the right tools, those are years when your life, career, and relationships just keep getting better and better.

I could teach a whole class on how to identify its lies and know, for sure, how great you actually are. (And I do!)

But not everyone can make that commitment right now. Sometimes, you just need to get some quick help, right away, and start seeing how it all works.

So I put together a quick workbook for you. It’s a 14-page PDF, full of things like:

• The most influential dysfunctional relationship in your life — with someone you probably see every day!

• 4 exercises that are crucial to exposing the way imposter syndrome works in your life, and just how far its roots go — so you can start tearing them out.

• And a simple secret that you can use to give yourself a powerful shift in perspective, any time you need it.

Here’s a Sneak Preview…

[A screenshot of page two of the workbook. At the bottom are three bullet points in blue and green boxes: '1. Rejection hurts. Avoiding potential rejection seems like a sensible choice. Putting yourself out there can be terrifying. 2. constant rejection Constantly believing you’ll be rejected actually means you’re constantly rejecting yourself. 3. A VICious cycle When you focus on your perceived lack of worth, you reinforce the belief that you’re not good enough.' The rest of the page, from the top, reads: If we believed that people were rejecting us for no good reason, we would feel outraged, not fearful. We would expect it to be a rare occurrence, not something we needed to put a lot of effort into avoiding. And it’s a vicious cycle. When we think that we’re not good enough — because other people have demonstrated that they think we’re not good enough — we spend a lot of time second-guessing ourselves. We spend a lot of time trying to guess how others want us to act and live, in order to be seen as “good enough.” Which means that we spend an awful lot of time reminding ourselves that we aren’t “really” good enough. Which then means that we feed a lot of energy into that belief. Which means that we spend even more time trying to defend ourselves against it. We forget — if we ever learned it — that even “not being good enough” would not justify other people treating us badly.]
[Screenshot of the first page of the workbook. The right side has a vertical bar with three questions: Am I good enough for the ones I love? Are my friends really just kind of putting up with me? How much of the work I do is actually good enough? The rest of the text reads, 'It can be really useful to think of imposter syndrome, or of your brain itself, as something that’s separate from the rest of you. Of course, the call is coming from inside the house: imposter syndrome is ultimately about how you feel about, and treat, yourself. But in another sense, these thoughts and feelings are your brain’s reaction to the world, not a core part of who you are. When it constantly questions whether others will accept you and treat you well, it’s trying to keep you safe from the emotional pain and trauma of rejection. The underlying belief is: if you try to put yourself out there -- who you are, what you do, what you think, what you feel -- people will punish you. They’ll shut you down, laugh at you, fire you, dump you, or punish you in some other way. For most, maybe all, of us, this is a totally reasonable belief. Sometimes because it’s true of the people around us right now. Often because it was true, at some point, and it felt bad enough to shape the way we interacted with the world ever since, to try to keep it from happening again. The problem is, the belief is actually that people will punish you when they realize you’re not good enough.']